The Town Crier is a weekly summary of Nicaraguan news stories that can be found online. My contribution is NOT journalism, as can be discerned from the conversational tone and dry humor of my English paraphrasing of the articles in Spanish. This list is by no means comprehensive. In fact I just picked the most relevant, funny and ridiculous news stories of the week. For real news in English check out the nicaraguadispatch.com. For entertainment, stay right here.
Here’s what’s been going on in this crazy town for the last week:
Rest easy, Esteli. Pepe the notebook-eating goat is under arrest.
It took a full police operation of a truck filled with cops but Pepe the pesky goat has finally been nabbed. The goat has been terrorizing a local school in Esteli by running in and eating students’ notebooks. This is not the first time a menacing goat has been a public nuisance in Nicaragua. In years past there were reports of other goats butting women in the legs in Esteli.
Horse gets tired of pulling cart, kicks the driver
A horse cart driver in Managua learned to take care of his motor after the horse pulling his cart got sick of being treated like a Managua horse cart puller and flipped the vehicle over. The enraged horse then kicked the driver in the head.
Zoo of New England working to save the Tapir in Nicaragua
Nicaragua’s tapir population is in significant decline due to habitat loss and hunting and the Zoo of New England has teamed up with Global Wildlife Conservation to help fight the problem with… a pamphlet. Rest easy, tapirs, it’s a really nice pamphlet. Seriously though, the GWC part is headed here by Chris Jordan, perhaps the only white guy who knows the Caribbean coast better than me. He’s a solid guy. And if anyone can make it work, he can. Good luck!
School roof collapses in Bilwi
The roof came crashing down on a school that was in session in Bilwi. Luckily the accident happened during recess but dozens of kids were treated for minor injuries.
C’mon MINED, get your shit together.
Earthbag school nearly 30% funded
The organization I work for, Seeds of Learning, is working on a crowd funding campaign to build a new school in El Jicarito, Tipitapa. The roof is guaranteed NOT to collapse because it is designed with earth bag walls, an stronger and cheaper alternative to adobe, blocks and cement. Even if you aren’t interested in donating, check out link below to get a better idea of the cool stuff we are doing in Nicaragua. If you like it, share it!
Nica busted in Tica land for fishing illegally
An undocumented Nica guy was busted fishing without a license in Costa Rica. He was accompanied by two Ticos. The cops confiscated 27 conchs, 3 lobsters, a speargun and diving equipment.
Shipwrecked Nica one of three rescued in CR waters
Three guys were picked up by the Tico coast guard after their boat sank. One of the three was a Nicaraguan living in the country. Reasons for boat taking on water weren’t clear, though they assured everyone they were certainly not fishing illegally. *wink, wink*
Nicas busted with counterfeit bills
Two Nicaraguan couples were busted changing counterfeit Tico bills on the bus in Costa Rica. They were caught after an alert was issued for people making it rain at the local market. With fake bills.
HKND to plant a half million trees once the rainy season hits
Bill Wild, HKND canal bigwig, said that they will soon plant 250,000 trees along the outer reaches of the canal route as soon as the rains come. Once the first phase is complete, they will plant another 250k to make half a million trees planted in hopes of offsetting the damage that will be done by razing the landscape along the canal’s 172 mile route.
Immigration officer busted for stamping false passport for $600
A former immigration officer took $600 in bribe money to stamp a fake passport for a guy from the Dominican Republic. The guy with the fake passport was later busted at the Nica/CR border and the stamp was discovered there. After a little bit of interrogation everyone came clean. The immigration officer is facing human trafficking charges.
Sandy Bay wants the cops OUT of their town
The indigenous Miskito population of Sandy Bay is tired of the police and want them out. The cops recently killed a guy after an altercation in the local baseball field, and the inhabitants say that if the police don’t leave there will be more confrontations.
Indigenous leaders upset over Nica’s land deal with Russia
Nicaragua recently signed a deal with Russia to invest in farming and other projects throughout the country. Local indigenous leaders are upset, calling the deal “obscene” because they have been fighting for decades to claim their territorial lands from the government.
Guy gets drunk, jumps off bridge and lives
A 23-year old guys suffered major head damage after jumping off the 80-meter high bridge in Muelle de los Bueyes. It’s a miracle he survived because the bridge spans only a trickle of water. The kid was drunk, so who knows. That might have saved his life.
Tornado destroys 3 houses in Leon
A tornado (probably a dust devil) ripped through a poor region of Leon ripping the roofs off three houses and causing at least on to collapse. Two of the houses belong to single mothers. The Sandanista Youth organization went into action donating ten sheets of roofing material and some much needed help to get their houses repaired.
Managua traffic is gonna suck until 2022
Managua has announced $200 million in roadway improvements scheduled to be in progress until 2022. The grand plan includes 9 overpasses and 35km of roadway. The article also says that each day there are 350,000 vehicles that are battling their way through town. A while back I read that each year brings another 20k cars to the city, so by the time the the roadworks are finished it will be time to start again.
French hiker survives nearly two days on Cosiguina
This french guy decided to hike to the top of Cosiguina volcano with only a liter of water and finally returned after being lost for 42 hours. During the hike he tripped and fell down a scree field, hurt his leg and became disoriented. He finally found a cabin where the local guy gave him some food and water.
US guy missing after meeting up with Nica woman
A guy from the states met a woman on facebook and flew down to meet her. Unfortunately, he hasn’t been heard from since. Article is in English:
Two fugitives escape from custody in Matagalpa
A coupla prisoners busted for robbery escaped police custody after leaving the courthouse clinic in Matagalpa. The fugitives took off running and ducking through alleyways in the direction of the highway. No word yet on if they have been caught.
Nica barista to compete international coffee making competition
A local coffee barista who won the national barista competition is on his way to Ireland to compete in the International Barista Competition. The proud coffee server says he learned by doing and wants to make a name for Nicaragua in the barista circle.
Get this delivered by email every week!
Just sign up to our newsletter below and never miss a week of the Town Crier!